How To Move On From Your Past Mistakes

How to move on from your past mistakes

5 min read by Chris Rea

 

We’ve all experienced it.

That sinking feeling of guilt, shame, and condemnation right after you’ve done something you know you shouldn’t have. Is there anything worse than the feeling of regret? And if you’re a Christian, it’s magnified by the fact that your behavior was witnessed by the Creator of the world!

We can trace this feeling all the way back to Genesis at the Garden of Eden. After Adam and Eve made the world’s first mistake, doing the exact opposite of what God asked them to do, they are met face to face with a brand new feeling: guilt.

 

They tried to cover their shame, literally, and ran and hid from God.

And guess what? We’re still doing the same thing thousands of years later.

Why do we do this? Why do human beings make poor choices creating baggage for themselves and the people in their life?

Because (deep breath) we are human beings living in a world filled with temptations. And even though we know the truth, even though we want to do what’s right, even though we want to make the kind of choices that lead to a bright future… sometimes we just don’t.

Today, if you are standing in the wake of one or two or two-hundred really poor choices, this post is for you.

There is a way to navigate out of the devastating consequences. Here are 6 practical tools to help you move forward from the guilt, shame, and pain you’re feeling.

 

 

1. Own your mistake

Don’t try and justify it. Don’t try and down play it. Don’t try to rationalize it. Your choice may have hurt people you love or who love you dearly. It’s time to give a sincere apology to the people you hurt with a promise that you are going to do everything in your power to not make the same mistake again. Be patient with the people you hurt. Chances are they’re going to need time to process and forgive. Be committed to doing whatever needs to be done to make things right and re-establish that trust.

 

 

2. Get Help

It’s time for a little self-reflection, friend. Why did you make this mistake? Was it just a temptation, or was there something deeper? Do you have a pile of undealt with trauma, fear, abuse, or baggage lingering in your soul?

If you’re caught in a pattern of repeatedly making the same mistake over and over, that’s called an addiction. And they can happen to the best of us when we’re trying to escape the pain in our souls on a quest for temporary relief. If you know something is wrong but you do it over and over again, chances are you are in desperate need of inner healing. Find a Christian counselor, or take an inner healing course (Here’s the link to a ministry who offers it online.)  If you are in Southeast MI, reply to this email and I’ll point you in the right direction. You don’t have to go through this alone; I believe freedom is possible for you!

3. Forgive yourself

You are a human being and human beings make mistakes. We all do. Every single one of us.

Just because you did a terrible thing doesn’t make you a terrible person. Yes, you made a bad choice, and yes you’ll have to deal with the consequences, and yes there could be life-long consequences for this mistake. BUT, know this: you made a mistake, you are not the sum of your mistakes!

[bctt tweet=”You may have made a mistake, but you are not the sum of your mistakes! #nosmalllife” username=”nosmalllife”]

Guilt is powerful. Guilt tells you, you shouldn’t have done what you did. But guilt is only good for about 30 seconds.  After that, guilt turns to condemnation.

And condemnation creates a prison causing depression, anxiety, and fear. Condemnation makes us want to run from God and the people we care about. Yet, instead of running away from God, go directly to Him. The times when I’ve gone to God, confessed my sin, and talked to Him about it not only relieved the guilt but helped me to feel better faster and forgive myself more easily. God’s grace is powerful!

 

 

4. Stay in the present

 

Every time you want to beat yourself up or every time the lies of the enemy assault your thought life, bring yourself back to the present moment. Fixing your mind on the past is unnecessary torture and will only create anxiety and stress. And in the same vein, worrying too much about how this mistake affects your future, will create an emotional paralysis.  Instead, you can choose to stay in this present moment, be all there, and trust the God who redeems your past and is already in your future.

 

5. Feed your Spirit

 

Galatians 5 reminds us we are both flesh and spirit.  Paul says,

“So I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh.  For the flesh desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the flesh.”

The key to living pure is intimacy with the God who knows you, loves you and created you.

And the key to this intimacy with God is to develop a few habits as a lifestyle. Habits like prayer, worship, Bible reading, fasting, giving, serving, etc.

“Feeding your Spirit,” is simply investing in your relationship with God.

Investing into any relationship is the key to growth and intimacy right?

 

The more we invest in our spouse through talking, dating, touching, kissing, sex, thoughtful gifts, kind words, the more connected to them we feel. And the more connected we are to them, the less likely we are to allow our hearts to wander toward someone else. The same is true with God. The more connected we are to Him, the less likely we are to run towards things which only bring temporary instant gratification.

 

 

6. Do something with your faith

You friend, have gifts and passions and a calling from God on your life.

And the number one way you can avoid the trap of instant gratification is to use your gifts to advance the kingdom of God. Nothing is more powerful than when God uses you to change a life. Nothing! In my life preparing sermons, writing blogs, teaching, and mentoring, these things bring so much more fulfillment than any momentary pleasure instant gratification tries to entice me with.

You are NOT disqualified because of your mistakes. If that were true, every person we look up to in the Bible would’ve been deemed a failure.

But you know what you have permission to do today? Get up and start doing something with all the gifts and talents God has given you. And not because you’re trying to earn your way back into His good graces, but because His grace is just that good.

[bctt tweet=”You know what you have permission to do today? Get up and start doing something with all the gifts and talents God has given you. And not because you’re trying to earn your way back into His good graces, but because His grace is just that good. #nosmalllife” username=”nosmalllife”]

You can’t change the past, but you can change your future. Simply do the next right thing. Don’t think about what feels like a mountain before you. Stay in the present and keep moving forward.

God’s unfathomable mercies are new. Every. Single. Morning. You are NOT the sum of your mistakes, you’re a human who made a bad choice. The future’s still bright, it is still full of hope, and God still has good things in store for you.

Until next time,

Chris

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