Don’t Give Up in the Messy Middle

I’m typically not the person who gives up in the middle of something, but last Spring I almost did.

The Messy Middle, the Wilderness, a Dry Season, whatever you call it, it’s a hard place to walk through.

Beginnings are exhilarating. The dreaming and planning stage is filled with anticipation and the hope of what could be.  And endings? They’re so rewarding. That moment you take a deep breath and lead back on your finished whatever. So Satisfying.

But the middle? That dang middle? It’s a mess.

On May 1st of last year, Chris and I had the carpets cleaned at our rental condo. This condo was SUCH a blessing! We loved (almost) 🙂 every minute of our 5-month stay there.  Our friend and realtor “happened” (#NothingIsCoincidenceWhenItComesToGod) to have it available on short notice SINCE our house sold in 1.5 days. We moved in late April. A few days later, I stood up in the wedding of a close friend. And the weeks prior to that had been filled with the “staging, cleaning, showing, packing, selling-all-your-stuff-in-an-estate-sale,” dance that is embarking on a fresh start.  Our lives were radically turned upside down, but our timeline demanded we keep powering through.

I was holding it together, even through the tears of walking out my front door for the last time.  However, on April 27th, the first warm day in the condo, we came to a very sudden realization: The previous renter, they must’ve REALLY loved cats. The odor now emerging from the beige shag carpet was living proof.  So on May 1st, after literally getting “settled” days before, we tore up the condo again to kick the cat stench to the curb.

And for whatever reason, seeing our new space in disarray made this girl, who craves beauty and order, lose her ever-loving mind.

 While the carpet cleaners worked their magic for 5 hours, Chris and I were sequestered to our mini balcony; eating our Panera salads and wondering what the HECKS we had done.

It was a magical time.  I wanted to throw in the towel. I wanted to go home. The problem was…I was “home.” When the carpet cleaning truck finally pulled out at 9:15pm, bless their hearts, I sat down on the 1 sq ft of Pergo dining room floor not covered in boxes and had a REALLY good cry. REALLY good guys.

We had now entered the “Messy Middle.”

Messy Middles want to threaten you that they are the end. They are not. However, they’re also not just something to “get through.” Messy Middles always have a higher purpose.

Right before Jesus was released into His time of ministry, He found himself in a Messy Middle called the Wilderness.  I guarantee you, it wasn’t something He was looking forward to. But He fought straight through it (just like Chris talked about here) Why?

He knew the Messy Middle wasn’t His destination, it was His preparation.

Today friend, if you find yourself in a Messy Middle, and you’re tempted to give up, don’t.

Let this girl who has wanted to tap out more times than she cares to count, speak a little truth over your soul.

What do you do when you find yourself in the Messy Middle?

 1. Speak the Truth

It’s easy to focus on the negative when you’re in the messy middle. It’s easy to let your circumstances dictate your mood, your attitude and drive the words that come out of your mouth. But I know you, you’re better than that.  When life is messy and the Wilderness dark, speak the truth of the Word of God out loud. My dad quotes Hebrews 12 to me all the time, “For the JOY set before Him Jesus endured the cross.” He says, “There’s no endurance without Joy Meg. The joy set before you is the strength for your journey.”

I love my Dad.  When the middle gets messy, we need the eyes-on-the-prize kind of Joy Jesus selflessly reminds us we can have in any circumstance.

2. Keep Moving Forward

Chris gave awesome practical advice on this topic here, so I won’t repeat it too much. Except to say, sometimes friend, the only way out is through.

Straight. Through. The. Mess.

It’s the stuff, “Messy bun & gettin’ stuff done,” coffee mugs are made of. We all have grit inside of us, God formed us out of dirt, after all, we just need to remind ourselves where our strength is coming from and KEEP. GOING.  Some days that looks like you’re taking so much ground you amaze even yourself! And other days…well, you made your bed and put one foot in front of the other. But either way, you moved forward. Even small steps add up to big progress if you keep going.

 3. Remind Yourself:  Messy Middles are preparations for promised lands

Messy Middles are not your final destination. They are your preparation. Each time we walk through one we’re greeted with an opportunity:  Will I trust God and lean into Him in the hard place or will I give it a go in our own strength?

I’ve done both. Might I recommend option A?

This middle won’t last forever & it can get a whole lot more hopeful if you’ll invite God into the Mess with you.   If you let Him, He’ll reframe it and teach you more in this place than a 1000 “mountain top experiences.”

I heard a speaker say the following one time and did what all good creatives do. I stole it. 🙂

  “To the same depths that you’ve experienced pain, you now have an emotional reservoir for joy.”

You may dig a lot of emotional wells in the Messy Middle. But’ll once they’re dug, you have a depth to you that can be filled with all the good stuff.  You’ve been refined. So God can now trust you with all the good stuff.

 4. Watch for God to show up in unique ways

When the children of Israel were wandering in the desert for 40 years, God showed up. God showed up in ways amidst they’re complaining and doubt, that could ONLY be contributed to Him.  The almighty leading you by day via a massive cloud? Sure. God of creation showing up as a fireball in the sky to lead you even when it’s dark? I mean of course. And then, King of Kings giving you 2 portioned controlled meals a day to teach you He’s a dependable provider? Now He’s just showing off. 😉 Whether it’s the big obvious thing or the tiniest minute detail, you KNOW some things can only be Him. He is so kind.

Are you in a Messy Middle today? Keep Going. It’s not the end. And while you’re walking, keep watch for the countless little nudges of assurance God is so faithful to give. What’s a unique way you’ve seen God show up for you?

People with their minds set on you,
    you keep completely whole,
Steady on their feet,
    because they keep at it and don’t quit.
Depend on God and keep at it
    because in the Lord God you have a sure thing. Isa 26:3-4 (msg)

 

Until next time, Keep Going 😉

Meg

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